2 Little Monkeys Jumping on the bed...

She Writes...


I have twins. Twin Boys. Non-identical medically and quite literally!! 

Caring for them, teaching, providing, nurturing and loving them is a full time job. I feel like I’ve been handpicked for one of best freelance jobs in the world!! Jokes aside, It is SO fulfilling to see them grow every single day. Dialling back a few decades ago, I remember how much I loved children and just being around them. So much so that one of the dreams growing up was to become a “kindergarten” teacher ! But, having one’s for my own has humbled me in more ways than one. My kids aren’t perfect. They make mistakes, they forget to share, they break stuff, they fight, they throw tantrums, they don't eat their food properly, they don't listen, they cry, they shout and basically as my mom would oh-so-proudly keep quoting,  they are being me 25 years back.

But, they are my monkeys. I want them to make mistakes. I want them to learn from their every failure. It is so endearing to see how young kids can change your perspective on persistence and patience. They fail over and over again but I’ve never seen them give up. The focus and grit children show while getting things done when they put their mind to it is something adults could definitely learn from. I for sure can! 

My monkeys jump on the bed, sing and laugh with no regrets. They don’t need to worry about the loosening bolts underneath, they don’t worry about messing up the sheets, they don’t worry about accidentally falling off the edge. I’ll rather them let them be children for as long as it lasts. In time, they’ll become adults who can never jump on a bed, adults know too much to enjoy these little quirky pleasures of the world.. 

2 little monkeys jumping on a bed

One jumped high and touched the others head

Mama saw the boys having all this fun and said

“Monkeys move along and let me also join on the bed”

Thank you, Life

She writes...

Do we always appreciate what we have ? I, for one cannot and haven't ever. Years have gone by when I have lamented about my state of life or the choices I've made. Every two years, like a magical pattern, I end up battling with one single most important issue that is going on in my life.

Today, As I look back I find these memories amusing. I am someone who lives in the past, and relax, that's not bad. That doesn't mean I cant live in the present and don't dream of my future. I just like dwelling in the realm of memories more often than not. I sometimes go to sleep wanting to dream about my past. Does that sound insane? Welcome to my world. However, this note is not one of repentance or reassurances from the past. This is one of those days where I feel blessed and happy about where I am in life.

I have always wanted to travel and live in new world. I have always wanted to meet new people and interact with other cultures. Although this has been my secret dream, I never dared to plan a trip wanting to do these things specifically. And i honestly don't think am adventurous enough to backpack across the country. So today, When I see myself setting shop successfully far in the north as north goes, I see it as an accomplishment. Mind you, I have done this with two fully grown toddlers. The last year has been exciting and challenging. I have always been cocooned in life. Everything provided for or with help always around the corner. But the true slice of life comes alive when you learn to live on your own and on your terms, learning, falling, fighting, loving and struggling and all that. Because this is the only way, you know what sweet success tastes like. Otherwise, you are only reveling in someone else's rain.

Life has taken some interesting turns and Boy! have I turned and how! I am not sure if my core self has changed but I sure feel different. I am still grappling with fear on most days but this feels good. Unless I am scared, how do I learn to overcome it ? SO, this is me, appreciating me, my life, my family and my world. Loving every bit of it and I wanna say "Bring it on.." But is it too early ? :-S

The song of a mother and daughter

She writes...


Sometimes all you need is a conversation with your mom. Yes, its that simple. A medicine to a broken heart, a solace for a trouble mind, a shoulder to rest. Just letting her listen to your miseries is in itself a consolation. She doesn't need to come up with any solutions to your problems neither does she need to advice you on how to handle them. She just listens. And, that i find to be the most refreshing thing ever. No, not a hot shower, not droplets of rain on my window, not a hot cut of coffee, the single most comforting feeling for me is to have a 2-min conversation with my mother.

Its kind of a miracle, if you think of it. I am a 30 year old who doesn't keep my mother up to speed on everything that's happening with my life. I have too many things going on in my life that is good enough to put a sane person into an asylum. Sometimes I even dodge her calls when am down and out, just cause I can choose to. (To hell with caller id's). BUT, sometimes I do pick up my phone, lookup 'Amma' and just like that, hit dial. I don't tell her that I am having a problem, I don't tell her that I need comforting, I don't tell her anything. It all starts with her popping the worlds biggest mom-conversation starter, "Did you eat?" and from then on its a song, my most favorite one.

Then we talk, I slowly indulge her in my state of mind, she listens, she sighs and finally she says, "Its ok, it'll be alright." and Voila, there you have it, my heart feels like a feather. I smile and end the call feeling like I've conquered something, that I can eventually figure out a solution and move on. The day has just begun to look radiant again.

On the other side of the world, a mother has just ended a perturbing call. She is thinking about her daughters problems now. She has taken it upon herself to sulk away in sorrow until she knows that her daughter is fine. She knows that she did the right thing by holding her fort and asking her daughter to be strong, but deep down she is broken. As years passed by, she feels like shes inefficient now, its not so easy to shoo away her daughters troubles like she used to. Nevertheless, She does what she's best at,even today, She says a little prayer and dozes off. 

I messed it up..... Again !!!

She writes...


The last ten years of my life has been intriguing to say the least. I have finally come to understand what the "elders" always used to fret about. I think the twenties are the times when you consciously know that your screwing up with your life, but you continue to do so nevertheless.

I have seen so many low's in my life, and invariably I tell myself  that, "this, right here is the lowest point of my life". Today, as I reminisce, I am laughing out loud at my insanity. For example, I cried to myself every single night of my training days in Ahmadabad as there was a chicken-pox outbreak in my hostel. Like, seriously, that I thought was the most difficult phase of my life. I did not want to catch the disease, but please don't think that I was being a major sissy or that it was because of my illness anxiety disorder. It just meant that I had to quit my 1-month old training and join the next batch and start afresh. Simply re-boot the last 30 days of my training with a new batch. Yeah, this could easily be the lowest point of anybody's life, right ?

But it passed. I came out of that ordeal unscathed. And from so many of such trials that I've self imposed on my life. If only I had some sense of reality during these times, a sense of control over the uncontrollable future that beholds, If only I had learnt to remain sane every time i was caught in the undertow, I could've helped myself more than I could imagine. In reality, It's really hard to underestimate your problems when you are in one. But life, I suppose, teaches you the trick. Slowly but surely.

I messed up an interview recently. One that I should've hit for a lofty six over the roof. There was no other option, this was it. My only chance, my only ray of hope, my only train to happy-land and I messed it. Right now, I am actually in a state of deep mourning for my career. And I can already feel the ground falling apart beneath my feet. I am depressed and practically cursing myself even as I write this blog. I don't have many friends to lament. God hasn't created Human beings to be tolerant enough to tolerate my rantings.

So as of today, this right now, is officially the lowest point of my life. And guess what, as I await my results, oh yes, I forgot to mention that I still haven't received my results of that dreadful interview (Did I hear you leave an annoyed "PPFFF" ? Trust me, I ruined it and Only a miracle could save me from this abyss),  I can't think of anything but failure, the dark road of depression and stormy showers of misery that follow. But, as i quoted earlier, I know i need to be calm, I know i am supposed to be real and strong, learn from the mistakes and be ready when am thrown a newer challenge.

Basically, just shut up and straighten myself. Because nobody else is going to be able to do that for me.

To Av and Ad

She writes...


Its 3:20 pm on a hot sunny day and you guys are fast asleep. This is your daily nap time.

I look at you two and I am filled with this enormous love that I can't seem to put in words. I don't think I can ever. I can't imagine something more surreal in this world than the love of a mother for her children. I am so gifted to have you two in my life. I sit here to pen this blog with a thousand thoughts on my mind, all of which converge to a single point, I love you boys. Please bear with my rantings, my heart is dying to pour this out and beware, it is mushy.

Av, Your smiles make my day. You are so gorgeous and handsome and!...  You are so bloody naughty. You just have your way with every darn thing and that's because you are so delightfully cute. When you are asking for your precious "thanni", in your adorable baby voice, I feel like I could bring the ocean to your feet. The way you call out for me softly, "Amma", that my dear, is my elixir. I should tell you, you have already garnered many fans. I am inspired by how you are always up for new challenges and eternally ready to learn new things. Will I ever be like you? And your dance, aww, that's all you do all the time these days. Dancing your way to glory and what a sight it is to see. I would love to be your dancing partner one day. You are the naughty one, the world doesn't know yet. But let's keep it a secret, shall we? You are my angel, you take one look at me with those beautiful arresting eyes and I have fallen. Yes, I am the first girl you swept off her feet. You are absolutely independent and my little genius, you have awed us right from the day you were born. Sweet little pie, I Love you so much.

Ad, You little brat. Your big eyes and those mischievous grins are all that I need to see when am back from a long day in Office. The way you shout out loud every time you see an airplane, the way you run behind "butterby" and "dangody" (Butterfly and Dragonfly for the uninitiated!),  the way you so adorably list out our names, ah i could just go on and on, the way you are just so perfect for us. When you gaze into my eyes as you are pointing at the"big star" in our neighbor's house and look to me eagerly for my affirmation on your discovery, I melt with pride. Yes dear, you are absolutely right, that is indeed a "Big Star", just like you! You are my shadow. The world knows that if am around, Ad is with me. What have I done to deserve your lavish dose of love. I haven't felt so wanted in my life. The truth is I need you more than you do. You are so stunningly handsome already with your gracious locks of hair and all. You hold us under a spell every time you flash that big bright smile of yours. You intelligence startles me at times and just like your brother,you too are so independent. You are a Sweetheart, Yes that's what you are. Charming, pretty little dude, listen up,  I love you so much.

Thank you Av and Ad for making my life so blissful. I finally believe in Magic.

Here's our little song,
I love you,
I love you in the morning and in the afternoon,
I love you in the evening and underneath the moon.

My shell

She writes...


Hmm. So this how my shell looks like now.
Been a long time since i've come in here.

Feels warm.
Feels like home.

I am blue....

She writes....

I wish I could cry out loudly like my little boys do.... someday perhaps. ....

Something died inside me... I cant seem to find out how this happened.... I used to be extremely touchy and sensitive and totally "cancer" like.

Tears a rare sight these days. Well, I suppose that's good in a certain sense but then, why doesn't it make me happy? My once marshmelloy heart seems to have turned to a hard rock !!! I have said this before and i'll say it again " no, I don't like growing up". Sometimes I wish I don't be a grown up about everything and I could just, for one prized moment, well up and blast off the tear tank.

Everyone has a tough phase and no amount of planning can prepare you for your adversities as long as you know how to deal with it when it actually happens. I don't want to deal with my situation anymore. I want to cry and make it all right. It seems to work perfectly for my boys. This is not a prayer but if you are listening big man, I NEED A BREAK !!!

Television at its best !!!

She writes...

Honestly, I've been watching all kind of TV series (including the shitty ones) for a very long time. But this one is just "on my god" all the way. Its like I was watching a hi-fi vala movie every monday morning. Yes, you know what am talking about. Game of Thrones !!!

Just got done with season 6 and "Loved it". Thanks HBO for this stunning entertainer. I actually binge watched it for the first five seasons. It was a slow drug but it surely did get to me. I don't remember why I resisted this all my life. The funniest fact is that I actually thought "Game of Thrones" was a super duper video game (*grinning*) until some maha purush told me that it was in fact a TV series !!

Anyway, that's old news. I am officially a GoT fan. And I've got news, they say we still have two more seasons to go, which means this show is scheduled to end in the year 2018. Phew, I haven't planned anything in my life even remotely close to 10 days. Talk about over-confidence.  Two years is a lot of time. I hope the actors don't die during this time !!! Tyrion, my man. Stay alive.

Just one gyan from this season, You see, the feminist in me sees an opportunity in the most weird spots. Hence, I have to say this, "Game of thrones has now become a Ladies game".
House Lannister - Cersei
House Stark - Sansa and Arya
House Tyrell - Lady Olenna
House Martell - Ellaria Sand
House Greyjoy - Yara
House Targereyan - Dany
Hell,
House Mormont - Lady Lyanna

Waiting for the white walkers to unleash a lady zombie soon !! Bring it on, Ladies...

Anyhoo, I can't wait for the next season. But for now, time to look for newer hobbies. No more of crazy Monday mornings. It goes back to being the most annoying day of the week. Yes, I am looking at you, Monday!
Till then, adios GoT. Hopefully i'll have something to write about you two years from now, when am blown away by this world of GoT over and over again.

Everyone's a Judge !!

She writes....

Oh god, I can't begin to count the number of people who have given me "important" advice on pregnancy and parenting. Surprisingly, this intrusion of my private life by an absolute stranger did not bother me much when I was pregnant. But boy, am i tired of these preachers questioning my ways of parenting!

I am tired. Sick and tired. When I became pregnant, no wait, when I got married, no wait, long before that, when I was in college, sitting in many of those boring lectures day-dreaming about my life, having children was most certainly a part of it. All my life, I constantly found myself making a mental note of things I would see, "I wouldn't do this when I bring up my child" , "I would certainly encourage my child to do this" etc etc..
All I did during my pregnancy was to dream about my unborn children (Ok, I had twins!) and what kind of mother I would turn out to be. Call it instinct or just plain belief in natural chaos, A MOTHER knows her children, at least until they can speak for themselves.

But nooooooooo, apparently the world knows better. It is expected that I should blindly follow what women did 30 years ago rather than listen to a qualified doctor who just happens to specialize in pediatrics. When I was born, giving powdered milk was in vogue. Infants, just days old, were given sugar syrups/honey (GOD knows why!). Solids were introduced at a tender age of 3 months. Everyone was more concerned about how to wean off the baby from breast milk than to actually focus on giving it when necessary. A crying baby is a hungry baby. A fat and chubby baby is a healthy baby. I could just go on and on and on.

My grandmother once told me that she breastfed her son until 2 years. My pediatrician says that I should exclusively breastfeed my babies for at least 6 months. So you see, somewhere in between, breastfeeding went out of fashion. Somewhere, Cerelac just took over.
I do not blame our previous generation because these things weren't researched and doctors back then weren't informed. The damage had to happen for us to be alerted now. But NO, no amount of WHO posters or warnings from pediatricians can deter the aunties from making us follow their practices today. They cannot see the reason why we are revolting for every single thing. Because, according to them, they are experienced and supposedly "the experts" in this business. But, parenting is not a "constant" , it is a "variable". IT changes with time. It is closely associated with how the world changes. Today, I am exposed to more pollution than I was 30 years back. Today, my world is more warmer than it was 30 years back. Today, there are millions of new diseases than there were 30 years back. So obviously, the method had to change. Children had to be brought up in the way that they could adapt to this world. Not the world of 1980's.
So No, I DO NOT want to put kajal on my newborn son's eyes. It is a chemical that my child doesn't need to endure and please, its not even pretty!

Stop this parent shaming. Stop judging us. Let us be the parents that we want to be. Let us make our mistakes. We love our children and every single atom that we move is for their good. Thirty years from now, things could change again, I could be wrong and trust me when I say this, I would happily embrace the change then.
Can you now ?
We want to see them to grow up to be better human beings. We don't want them to be our clones !

30 going on 30...

She writes...


When you are reaching 30, your life pretty much resembles a sine wave.

You can either be extremely happy or in the dumps. Yes, think about it - You are happily married to someone you love but you are secretly wishing for your doggone independence. You are single and strong but you know that you are panicking every time you see a happy couple. You are earning a hefty salary but you hate your job. You love your job but earn peanuts. You become a proud parent but you just lost your social life. You can afford the best dress in the world but you look like a fossil by now.

Ah...the up's and down's of our lives....

Can we have a plate of Justice please ?

She writes,


It was July 12,2008 when I sat down to write a blog about Arushi Talwar murder case. I vividly remember, I was heavily drunk with anger and frustration over the incompetency of our Police and those stupid media houses.

It’s been 8 years since, EIGHT YEARS. I can’t believe this putrid case lies just there. And there's been a book and now a movie. I quivered initially at the thought of a movie. I mean, come on, do we really want to see a movie which we know doesn't have a climax? But Arushi has been in my thoughts for a long time now and i wanted to see what the film makers had to say this time around.

I knew everything from the start, all the evidence, all those conspiracy theories, everything. But it still was a gripping watch. Unfortunately, it brought with it all those emotions back. I forget as to what happened in these eight years. Have we given justice to Arushi yet? How is this ccountry so silent ? I know, this is just one of the many cases. I know people tell me there are thousands of Arushi's who haven't got their justice yet.
I guess, in India, we are all in an eternal state of Coma. We will do the right thing and believe in its legal system. Always.
We will let go of a rapist who just happens to be a 17 and half year old poor little juvenile. He is such a child. Period.
Justice will be given. Say, 20 years?

I used to be a patriot. I think I still am. I dare say a wrong thing about my country, ah I have sinned. Well, those were the days. I don’t know if growing up has given me a perspective that I wasn’t exposed to as a child or my country has actually changed or the people in it. Why can’t we find solutions to any problems? Or is it that difficult? We are flourishing, India is marching ahead but are we? Too many questions and too few answers.
Not every country is perfect, they say. Yeah, I agree.

Meanwhile, Arushi is wondering about her Justice… Its high time… she ponders…


PS:
My last post on Arushi
http://shewrites-dpka.blogspot.in/2008/07/police-story-and-black-media.html

Hi 2016, Year of "Me" !

She writes..


........ I cant begin to count the number of times i've long-pressed the 'backspace' key in my keyboard before i framed this first line. Yes, that many.

Well, looks like everything's changed in here. I almost start of as a fresher. I should probably say, I used to blog. While i was busy being a wife and a mother for the last couple of years, life's changed quite a bit on this side of the world. The virtual side i mean.

It was a wonderful ride, though. Years ago, i wrote about how nervous i was to become a MRS. I forgot to write how crazy I was after I became a MOM. But, now that i have tasted both the wines, i must say, bravo!

I believe, I've managed to survive both my titles. But, what i have missed is probably the 'Deepika-ness' which is me. I think most women go through a phase in their life where they put all their priorities behind and focus solely on family and children. Ok, not all women (for all you feminists out there!). Only me! Lets look at my track record for my online time, shall we ?

Things that i have not done in the last couple of years when am online
1) Listen to TONS of music every single day
2) WRITE
3) Watch crazy shit load of movies
4) READ

Things i have done in the last couple of years when am online
1) "FACEBOOKING"

Sad, isn't it ? I have had stories to write about every single day, yet i never sat down to write any. FB is evil. My sense of humour (i would like to believe that i had some) is out of the window. My writing skills have decayed. My taste in music is tacky. My ignorance is at its peak.

SO, here I am, trying my luck again (for the nth time). I hope I can stop complaining about the lack of time and actually start making some time for myself.
The only thing that encourages me to come back to this fossiled page is the pleasure of reading through the stories that i've written in the past, pages from my own life, like time capsules they are etched here.

I certainly don't want to miss out on the best snippets of my life just because my ass got a little bigger and i got stuck in my chair.

For now, Signing off with a cheeky line (hope to get back into rhythm in the coming days!)
Adios

Bring back those days...

She writes..

How dearly i wish for my childhood to return, i can never explain. Why do people have to grow old?Why cant we live and die as children ?

Am sure God could have designed things that way if he wanted to. After all he's the creator of the universe, isnt he?
Then why this complication. Growing up is a bad joke played on us. At the end, am sure nature has the last laugh as it points its mighty finger at us and says,"Ha Ha!! Gotcha !!"

As a child, you know what i had always dreamt? To be born as a Bird in my next birth. Sometimes this changed to Fish too. I don't remember the logic behind wanting to be re-born as birds or fishes. May be i wanted to fly away when ever i wanted, may be i wanted to swim away in the big blue ocean. May be i just had a huge fascination to big blue vast spaces. Sky or ocean.
Oh wait a minute, i once wished to be re-born as a crocodile. Please dont ask me why!

Things haven't changed much. I am living the dream life now. Yet, any day i would still let go of everything i had just to go back to being a 5 yr old and dream about such weird stuff. All this experience, all the education, all the technology seems meaningless to me at times. Call it the quarter-life crisis or whatever.

Growing up gives you tons of responsibilities. There's so much expectation for you to prove yourself. 10 years back, all I had to do was pass my maths exam to prove myself. Back then, my only serious concern was to drink milk without any fuss.
You reach 25, people start looking at your material property, question your marital status, question your acheivements. Are you married? Did you finish your PG? Did you buy a house? Do you have the latest mobile ? Where's your car ? When will you have children ? Aren't you going abroad ?
As much as i enjoy answering all these questions to random strangers, I am not a saint after all.  I would like to have all these stuffs myself, but why the curiousity? Why so serious?
Why can't life be slow paced?

God, as a 10 yr old, i would just have to wake up in the morning, get nicely fed by mom, wear my brightly pressed uniform, go to school, enjoy the games period and occasionally study, get back home by 3 PM, run outside to play, eat dinner and sleep !! What a life... What-a-Life !!

Bring back those days, i say.

The Dirty Secret.

She writes...

It is not surprising to see so many women coming out from their closets now and writing about the horrific experiences that have happened to them in their lives. Please dont get me wrong, i am truly and completely a part of this revolution. This post might be disappointing in a way for some as i dont have any such gory incident to be narrated here. Atleast nothing too specific that i could share. But does that make me a lesser victim? I dont think so.
As a school girl, i too used to travel in these death buses. Taught to dress "decent", Not to talk about groping as it made me look dirty, that if a guy gawks at me, it is my fault that i provoked him (by making myself seen by him, apparently). He is the prince of India, you see.

"This" happens. EVERY girl in India knows that this happens. We have all lived with it. So many women, so many stories. Now.
I am more than confident that if it comes to, "Has it happened to you?" question, every other girl you know has a story to say. It has taken us this long to realise that this disgusting reality is the true story of our 'mother' nation. This is our dirty secret. We need shaking cover stories in newpapers and TV channels to bring this bare truth to our faces. Isn't it utterly shocking that every girl in this nation has a story of sexual harassment and yet we have chosen to live with it in the country that calls itself oh-so-proudly a 'democratic'.

So what do we do now? The government is running out of statements to make. Protests are on and off. We have some sections of people demanding a martyr status for the girl. Some are outrageously asking for a Bravery award to be awarded to this girl. How intelligent. I am surprised by the intellect of these people.
To all these megaminds, all i have to say is, WE ARE ALL DAMINI'S. We are all Nirbhaya's. Award us all , every woman who has lived, survived and died this torment. Make us all martyrs. Damini is not one person, it is a symbol. Damini did not fight a war, she was fighting for her dear life. Damini is not a matyr, she is a Victim. A poor helpless victim.
Because the truth is, On Dec 16, Six animals were on a bus. If not her, it was another girl.

Let me throw some light on a very real incident that i witnessed. Yesterday, i was travelling in a local suburb train. The station was heavily crowded, i manged to get into the Ladies compartment. My husband not knowing that it was ladies compartment got into the train behind me. There was hardly 10 seconds for the train to kick off and at that very moment he realised that it was the ladies compartment. He risked a chance, got off the train, ran to the adjacent compartment which was packed as hell. Lucky he managed to get in. The ladies section was light and had some space to sit and breathe air. All subsequent stops, huge crowd again. And now what i see, at all stops, men started getting in. Around 40 to 50 men got into this compartment. Knowing VERY well that it was a ladies section. I saw these men boarding the train as they slowly clogged the entrance. Just minutes ago, ladies were able to move around freely and now they had to pass the great big man barrier to get on and off the train. They had no shame no remorse and they knew we were not going to complain. Several of these men were gawking at the seated woman. Ah, so much meat. As if the women were items on their window shopping spree.College girls shrugged. A Young mother hesistated to feed her crying baby. Women now sat upright and held their stuff closer. Women adjusted their dupatta's. These men were just looking, not raping. So technically, they are at no fault. But you all know the look, dont you?
After i got down from the train, i asked my husband what was the fine for men travelling in ladies compartments. He said "If police spot them, then its Rs 50, else its a free comfortable ride". Repharse - Free and entertaining ride.

Now, Imagine if the fine was Rs 5000. Would a man dare to get inside? Imagine if police officers were posted at every stop 24/7 to monitor such cases. Would a man dare to board? This is just a very simple example of how useless our system is as-is. Am not even talking about groping or rape or harassment here. This is the day-to-day reality that we see.

No punishment, No fear. 
No fear, No remorse.

Punish, Punish the bastards who do wrong. Punish the men who exploit women. Punish them badly. Punish them so much that other rogues dont dare to think. Enough of this soft country bullshit. Rapists are not men, they are pure blooded animals. Even a gun shot would give you instant death, what these men do, leave us women bleeding for life.

To all the men i ask, as an Indian man, dont you feel ashamed to know that India is not a safe country for women. Dont you want to kill these animals ?
Be a man. Being a man is being a friend to your woman.
They say, Woman are free today. Let them be.

We can't rely on government. They dont give us answers. We can't rely on police. They are not around when we need them. Take the system in your hands and do the correction.
I speak to today's generation. I appeal to my friends who are going to become father's tomorrow.

Teach your daughters to be independent. To be bold to speak about the injustice that happens to her. Teach her that she is not at fault for such crimes, that she is as pure as can be. Teach her to keep her head high and walk on a lonely road without fear. Teach her self-defence. As a father, brother, husband, boyfriend - Help her fight.

Teach your sons to respect woman. Teach him not to gawk at girls who chose to wear the dress that they like. Teach him not to tease and scare woman on the road just to feed his ego or show off to his friends.(Trust me, educated guys from the so-called good families do this even today). Teach him to love woman. Teach him to promote equality. Teach him that the movies that preach Good Women are "traditional" are bullshit. Teach him that woman are just like them and not under them. Teach him to fight the crime when he sees it happen. Teach him to be a Real Man.

The time is NOW, the world finally knows our dirty secret. Nothing can be done to hide it anymore. Dont just say, 'Is desh ka kuch nahi hone wala hai' (Nothing good will happen to this country).
Bloody, be the change.

Best roller-coaster ride ever..

She writes..

How does it feel to be free ? I will let you know soon.

I just got released from my current assignment after 2 years of non-stop work. Lots have happened in the last two years but something that has just remained constant is my WORK. Every day, for 2 years now, i worked.
The longest Roller-Coaster ride i've ever been in. Tears, smiles, shocks, surprises, appraisals,awards...

And now, its all over. The baby that i nurtured for 2 years ,has been handed over to someone else. I have to say, i am experiencing something that people usually call "mixed-emotions". I was waiting until my wedding day to experience one of these but funnily enough, work has taken a lead this time. I am certainly not a work-o-holic. But somehow i feel possessive of the way i dealt with this project. In the begining, it was evil, i tell you. In modern english, i would call it an horcrux that i unabashedly wore around myself for two full years. I failed, i faultered, i flawed, i hurt myself but i survived.

I was rewarded for my work. I was appreciated, i received the most coveted titles. Yet, the most happiness that i got was when everytime i saw the tiny-tot take baby steps and make it into the bigger world. OK. I am talking about the production/live deployment of the deliverables for a change request. OK. In english, project completion.
It was mine all the way, no team, no people. IT was mine and I was proud EVERY time.

If i had to go through the same ride for an other time, would i say yes ? I wouldn't know the answer. I have changed, life changes. But today, as i see the last two years unfold in front of me, i am tempted to be nostalagic, i am sentimental after all. Thanks almighty, for letting me experience something like this, something that almost nearly KILLED me. Thanks for keeping me alive, i depart with a bow. I will miss you. Good Bye CR2.

It's only the start...

She writes...

Two months from now, i would be a Mrs.

Well, life does change... and fast !! These days, i often hear voices in my head shouting "Arghh, you are SO young to be 'Mrs.Deepika', 'Why now ?', 'Why not later?', 'Is this all?', 'So wife huh ?!!' " .

It is scary, these thoughts. Life beyond the nuptial bond seems like a true mystery and not in a great way. But hey, don't blame me, it is not like anyone who gets married ever paints you a rosy picture of marriage.

Two and half years back, i met this guy.. in a land that i had hitherto only seen on the physical map of India. Somewhere, i know Gandhi did something (!). Something to do with the IIM's (!).....
Anyway, this guy, he was a charmer by all means and yet somehow i managed to ignore him. He was there, sitting next to me, from 9 AM to 6 PM, working with me.. a colleague... and we neither greeted each other nor did we acknowledge each other when we met outside. Weird.

His silence raised my curiosity by the day. Just for the heck of it, I nick-named him "sadhu", someone who, in regional terms, simply means a silent harmless monk !!! Well, Sadhu, not for long. It took me a few more days to realize that i had woken up a "drunken/hangover'ed" lion with my silly insinuations. And that's the start of the greatest friendship ever. I laughed like never before, I had fun like i never had in years, his presence would brighten my day and boy, what a friend he turned out to be? May be that's why i gave him a 5x5 cm cute little hallmark card that said "You are even better than i thought" :)
Night walks, phone calls, SMS, e-mails, gossip, me whining, his jokes, 'nariyal paani' in the canteen, flight journey, auto rides, 'Bhagyodhay's' lemon rice, Panner mania, Iskon mall, ebony lounge, '99' - the movie, infocity resort's pavement....

Well.. love stories just go on.. don't they? *smiles*. Too much said, months passed and I had my share of surprises too, on the eve of my 22nd birthday was a proposal on the sands of thiruvanmiyur beach, a bouquet of roses, a birthday cake that said "for the birth of You and Us" , a swarovski ring... and, everything that a girl wants. Life has never been the same ever since. Tons and galloons of love, laughs, tears, hugs, smiles,fights, fun, happiness and lots and lots of love.... Some more love... Add a tinge of love... a little more.... ah well, its never enough. :)

We make a good pair, you know. May be, that's what our parents saw in us ( 'what we made them see' would be more appropriate !! ). In south india, once you bring the parents in the picture, enlighten them about your relationship, throw in an ounce of seriousness in your tone, expect the next word to be "Marriage". and that is exactly what happened.

Two n half years, seems like a glorious route travelled and the road ahead after two months has the direction sign that says "Life" with -> arrow board. Am i ready to set sail ? I don't know.But one thing that i would do with my eyes closed, is to hold the hands of my guy and walk beside him forever and ever.

I might be freaked out with all this sudden change of comfort zones, marriage responsibilities, new title, new relatives et all.. but he's out there laughing at my innocence and telling me "Idiot, its going to be fine". [and the psycho that i am, i am thinking, 'Dude, your going to have to do a LOT more to be just fine living a life with me] and he gives me his re-assuring smile, like as if he just read my mind. See, right there, that's where he wins me all over again. DAMN.

Thus, i answer the voices
"Arghh, you are SO young to be 'Mrs.Deepika'" = "Am i, then THAT is what adds to the FUN part, doesn't it ??? Younger wives are better than older hags !!! am gonna make all you married couples SO jealous (ok sorry.. Mom says i shouldn't say such things )"
"Why now?" = "Yes, NOW, Right away.. "
"Why not later?" = Later ??? how about a micro-milli-mini-second later ?
"Is this all ?" = Bring it on !!
"So wife huh?!!" = So..... WIFE huh :-)

Two months from now, Meet Mrs.Deepika. :-)

Miss.Deepika
Signing Off

Its me.. breaking the rules... Yay !!

She writes..


Finally... I've figured out a way to write blogs sitting in my office cabin. And yes, am breaking the rules by doing so. Seriously, my life has taken a super-duper 360 degree turn in the last one year that i finally realise HOW much fun it is to break rules.
Not that I've always been following them, i just don't break them. Got it? Anyway, coming to my point... YES.. i can write blogs sitting in my office cabin. Isn't that absolutely great ? Okay, am not asking.. That IS great.
so..... "YAY" !!
I cant even begin to explain how many numerous times i would've died to write a blog about something and by the time i reach home, i would end up being so tired and i would hardly start my computer...
Phew !! Anyway, i hope my good self doesn't come out of the closet again and stop me from posting blogs from office JUST BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT ETHICAL !!!

tweet tweet wat ??

Shes wonders...

What's a tweet ??
So now, Tweeting is a word or something ??
Oh.. Twitter is it ?
What is that ?
HELP* !!

*( Google might banish me from the net for not knowing what twitter is !!)

How's life ?

She writes...

How's life ?
This is probably the first thing your long lost friend asks you when you meet after a long time ( by long time, i mean the time that you've exactly taken to forget the poor dude(tte) in front of you and vice versa ) .
In fact, cut the sarcasm, this is probably the first thing just about anybody asks you when they are in terrible desperation to start a conversation. So, how exactly are you supposed to answer this question without actually meaning to answer ? Because, face it.. your life is not something you can actually explain as an answer to a question with 2 words in length.
We say,
1) "Am fine, how's yours ?" - Which means, i really dont wish to discuss MY life with you and am certainly not interested in yours !
2) "Going on.. " - Which means, Its going on BAD !
3) "Ya... going on" - For those you who are thinking, whats the big "ya" going to make a difference to point 2 and 3 ? Well, the much prolongated "ya" simply means... hmm, its not too bad.. but nothing's happening.
A smaller "ya" would mean, am just trying to answer your question faster cause my life is boring anyway !!
4) "Super" - This one's tricky, The answer can be either sarcastic, more like "duh... am dying and you ask me how is life ?" Or it can actually be Super ! ( Yeah, dont be surprised.. some life stories are actually "super" !!)
5) "Bindaas" - Okay, that's the hindi slang. And this means, the dude doesnt give a damn to his life or your question!

Anyway, Apart from all the amazing gyan that am boring you with, i think "how's life?" is a question thats used quite liberally. Imagine the poems it can bring out of a person when asked at the right time, in the right tone, with the right emotion and right look !
Hmm....

So there it goes...

She says..

Loved you 2009, you were the best.. You made me cry, made me laugh ( note the order !) , made me love, made me live.. You rocked!
My Referral :- http://shewrites-dpka.blogspot.com/2008/12/adios-two-thousand-and-eight.html
Boy, did i live it QUEENSIZE !!

God, Be kind to us. We love you.
HAPPY NEW YEAR to one and all!!!

Okay... you gotta say "YAY" now !!!